Sunday, May 22, 2011

I'm not into Rapture, I like Hip Hop

So it seems I've been left behind, its probably for the best, I had nothing packed anyway. I'm going to start my day by going out and seeing which of my friends took off w jesus. I think ill also hit Facebook to see if anyone posted on the way up, I'm sure jesus would allow his Rapture selections one last update before they hit the skies. In order to be sure of this Rapture thing, I may just have to get my jehovah on and start knocking on some doors. 

Yah home, anyone home? 

I've got some Heaven bound salt of the Earth people in my life, I'll make sure to check in with them to determine whether this has happened or not, Hell, I could easily just turn on the tv and let CNN report it's findings, I know my Anderson Cooper with shoot it to me straight.

So what to do w/ my first day of hell,  hmmmm I think ill start with brunch. Some eggie type dish, maybe a Benedict. Bloody Mary with a beer chaser. I was joking earlier in the week that after the Ratpure I'm gonna have a better shot at getting a seat on my daily commute, so maybe ill know for sure monday morning.

One final thing... Randy Macho Man Savage died on friday in a terrible car crash. Maybe jesus recruited him to help gather the folks.


  1. If he was recruiting, I might actually listen to his shpeel.

  2. Todd, Glad to know that you are left behind to shake and stir things up. How incredibly dull hell ( I mean this world) would be without funny people making fun of other sinners.

    I enjoy reading through your posts; You have such a unique take on things. Will drop in again soon.

  3. I'm still here.... I think. Or is this hell?
    I can hear my daughter singing off key in the other room, so it may be....

  4. I broke into a little Elaine Stritch after the Rapture failed to take me away....."I'm still here!"