Monday, June 6, 2011

Yup, them my holes. Don't mess w/ my Bushes!

Yuppers, summer 2011 has begun and the garden project is complete.  I have all my fingers and toes and my transulcent pale skin did not shrivel up underneath the blazing sun. My body soul and mind seem to be intact, however,  my beer supply is a little low but a quick visit to my Vietnamese Liquor lady will cure that.

Prior to this project I haven't touched earth for years, being a condo dweller and living in the city, my connection to nature is very artificial.  The closest I get to the ground these days is w/ a plastic baggie when go to pick up Samson & Baxters' droppings, yeah real cute, does wonders for my reputation.  "Hey, there is that lanky bald man w/ the 2 yappy he picking up shizz?"  ahhhhh, yes,  that would be me, carefully picking up doggie goodness and sealing it up in a plastic bag.  There's got to be landfills of doggie specimens that go back for decades.  Forget about mosqitoes being forever encased in tree sap, we've made it real easy on the future scientists,  they'll be able to resurrect any of today's canine companions using the DNA from a petrified turd..... just like Jurasic Park.  

I've been happy being outside tending to the soil.  I did some watering today and spread some weed kill on the front lawn, got lots of crab grass and dandelions out there, looks real messy.  We want that lawn to be groomed and lovely w/ a consistent look. Kind of like Ricky Martins chest.  In fact I used to cream my coffee to match Ricky Martins complexion but since then I've been holding off on the dairy, so my coffee these days looks more like Samuel L Jackson.  I guess Ricky Martin is my complete style icon, shaking my bon bon and livin la vida loca, just got to figure out how "She Bangs" fits into my program.

Here's to a Happy Monday and to a week full of success & friendship and also to rid my mind of that Taylor Swift song I hummed everyday last week, I can't take it anymore.


  1. Good to hear about some successful horticulture.

  2. Ummmm wow -- that garden project is damn impressive!!!

    I SUPER miss Ricky Martin toned coffee... but hey Samuel L. ain't so bad!

  3. Hi, I'm stopping by from Monday Blog Hope- I am a new follower and would love a follow back. :)

    Love, Shellsea Blog

  4. The garden looks great. I'm quite the horticulturist myself, so I can appreciate this.

    Does Ricky Martin have a long chain coming off a nipple ring? You know what, forget I asked.

  5. I'm horrid at gardening stuffs...especially when a random spider crawls out of the dirt.
    *dies a little*

  6. I adore gardening, just getting stuck in there with my hands full of earth and muck. Ah, if only I had more time for it! I hope your garden prospers. x

  7. Love a bit of gardening time. No Ricky Martin garden gnomes at my place though

    Thanks for Rewinding at the Fibro.