Monday, April 25, 2011
WARNING---this blog may cause Seizures
yeah, English teachers from all around are rounding up, lighting torches, sharpening pitchforks and preparing for my ultimate demise. Sure.... I use the ..... (dot dot dot) method a lit'l too much. I put ; wherever I like only because their soo damned cute. The years I was supposed to learn these skills were supposed to occur in jr. high---7th grade I believe. I not sure if this happens to most people but I found myself in an outta control classroom. First day of school we were greeted by a nice enough women---had an Olive Oil frame (Popeye's girlfriend) and a single white female hairstyle except it was brunette--not fire red. Second day of school----SHE GONE! We are told that for personal reasons she will no longer be our 7th grade English teacher.....rumors start to circulate that she had a nervous breakdown but I'm not sure that was the case---however seemed likely, so I went w/ it. In her place a district substitute was sent---an excitable lady w/ cotton candy hair. She wore outfits w/ heavy fabric and paisley prints---UNgood. yes sirsz. my classmates smelled blood and went in for the attack. the boys would bring in those grocery store produce bag closures and fling/zip them across the room at each other---others brought pockets of pennies to throw and this poor abused teacher would turn her head to wherever the penny landed, like a comical tennis match....I have to admit it was pretty funny---I also have to admit I threw a penny or two. I couldn't help it---the room was outta control. She had lost control; she began to teach to only a couple of students in the the front of the class while the rest of us carried on----she did her best to stay focused on the 2 or 3 good kids but would eventually break and loss her cool---we howled. we were horrible. I don't remember how long this lasted--probably a week or so before the school sent us another teacher and THIS LADY was good. She was REAL good. Obviously she had been told of our behavior; she must've rehearsed that introduction speech she gave us because it worked. We went from fright night to strawberry fields in that one paragraph of words she delivered. I can only remember the last sentence though, probs because it was the most poignant.....there standing in her navy blazer skirt combo w/ white starched collar, raised finger looking at us like felons " all of you...... are now mine!" and w/ that sentence we were. She captured control and eventually lowered the finger. I believe she taught us English and stuff but I can only remember the time she said she didn't like the female voice on the radio. I thought that was strange, this strong women going against her own kind. hmmmm. I carry a respect for her and also the poor woman we abused.....hell....I respect the nervous breakdown lady. I hope all of them are doing well these days, I guess I could work the internet fantastic and try to locate them....maybe I should. I have had a lot of great teachers----Gustafson, Gilbert, Martin, Lau, Walters, Swartz----great peeps and good memories. I can't imagine being a teacher, holding the attention of these youngsters with their sticky hands and odd twitches--I am sure there is joy in it and I am so thankful for them. I enjoyed those days----wearing my plain pocket denim jeans and drinking those 1/2 pint milk cartons. kickball at recess, bike locks & crossing guards. now Crossing guard! hmmmm that could be cool!---I could do that!