In a pinch? You can count on Us!

Portable restroom companies hold a tight squeeze on us when it comes to options for outdoor relief.

Being in the event industry I have had the pleasure to peruse and select amongst various outfits who deal w/ the containment and removal of human waste, it is comforting to know that a company has dedicated it's mission statement to deal w/ my wild abandon, my funked up surplus, my Willy Wonka and Dark side of the moon byproduct.

A few of my favorite portable restroom companies:

• Oui Oui. (wee wee)
• Porta-John
• LepreCan
• Life Savers
• Drop Zone w/ Company colors, yellow/brown (my personal favorite, let's call it #1)

Day 2 of 3 at Pitchfork Music Festival 2011 Chicago and the portable restroom scene is pretty clean. I do have to say being a dude with a wang sure helps. Those with Tallys have the benefit of peeing while standing up, my ass remains clean having not rubbed against a seat that has been shared by the following attributes of a stranger:

• Sweaty
• Hairy
• Boil & Pimple
• Dirty w/ grime
• Butts, Butts, Butts

Why hasn't someone invented a lady version for upright peeing? Am I wrong in thinking that this can be done? I am not a master of the female anatomy but certainly have a good idea of how it works for a women.  Yes, I get that it's like a lawn sprinkler down there for you ladies, so I'm thinking a wide curved reservoir that a woman could straddle would handle the unpredictable flow pattern, thus allowing the female one of life's greatest joys, Lettin that River Run.

Come on ladies, if you haven't experience the feeling of upright peeing with hands on hips, you've been missing out.