I don't give to Lipschitz

hello my name is todd and i am an addict.  my drug of choice is lip balm. i turn to this in the morning, afternoon and night.  i reach for it when i'm nervous, excited and when someone looks me straight in the eye.  i love my glossy moist lip, reflecting light as it slips back and forth against the other.  my brand is chap stick, i always have this with me, front right pocket.  i have enjoyed the pricey stuff but as with any addict you eventually rely on the cheap stuff to get you through.  have you ever heard of a drunk who throws down bottles of Dom?  well maybe Paris & Liza!

"gotta dance gotta sing.....are yah listening BROADWAY!

  hey fella!, ice down this gin, i'm boiling under these lights."

speaking of ladies.  i heard that a lady doesn't leave a lip mark on her wine glass.  im not sure how this is accomplished.  i've asked my friend kristen to investigate this, she's got her lady skillz down, she's also a big fan of encased meats but I'll save that lit'l gem for another post.  me, being a chap stick holic also tend to leave a waxy lip print on all my glassware.  ive tried to master the leave no trace behind technique, i think it involves using your tongue but in a delicate way.   

tongue is fun!

this is a tongue of fun!

tongues in space!

What's tongue got to do with it, got to do with it!

take this tongue and shove it!  

oh dear,  I'm gonna have some nightmares.  I want to take this opportunity to personally apologize to Paris an Liza for my comments earlier.  I love these broads, I love em!  They are full of vigor and Gusto! They both love to look good and to put on a show and for that I can't fault em. no!  NO! 

bleed your heart out baby, this cookie ain't rolling over for any ole pony show

HuRay! hooRoy! .............try on them stockings.

and what?